Denise A Jumprope, and Some Sunlight
Here’s an old article brought to my friend Andy Petranek down at CrossFit LA. It is a list of benchmarks that every man should be fit enough to save his own life in an emergency. Sexism aside here is the list:
Swim at least 1/2 mile
Run top speed at least 200 yards
Jump over obstacles higher than your waist
25 Pull ups
25 Dips
How would you do on these tests (male or female)?
Interesting. As far as bodyweight stuff goes, I’d say the ability to hang from a bar for a minute, do a muscle-up, crawl 400m and run one mile would all be pretty important, too. Probably more so than being able to do 25 pull-ups and dips. But people can also fail to save themselves because of lack of strength, so how about including the ability lift heavy objects overhead and off the ground, as well as pushing and dragging?
Maybe we should have a “save your life” week? Hm….
How about being able to throw a punch. Seriously, most people don’t really know how to do so effectively. Being able to throw your bodyweight over your shoulder and run 50 meters or walk 400m also comes to mind. I think that being able to save your own life also includes being able to save your buddy’s, since in many endeavors (military, law enforcement, public service, adventure excursions, etc) you’re interdependent on your partner.
You should also have some adequate training on how to deal with woment in certain situations, since they’re the most dangerous things on earth.
Words of wisdom from,
-Amadraeus
lol Drais did you mean to type Women? (woment).. Well i have to disagree, men can be pretty dangerous too, read on.. Okay this has been coming to mind but because it’s a little embarrassing.. well here it goes. Okay I saw this in a movie many years ago (can’t remember which one) and out of curiosity, I have reenacted it and haven’t been able to get myself out of it, as of yet. In the movie, a woman’s male partner has a heart attack and dies on top of her (during the act) and she is trapped under him. She can’t get his body off her. Since seeing this, I have tried a few times to remove a male’s “dead” body weight off of me, and the result is I cannot not budge. Not only that, i can barely breath and feel as if I’m being crushed. Now obviously if one chooses physically fit partners they are not likely to “die” on top of them, but i imagine there are plenty of situations where someone would have to get out from under some kind of heavy dead weight. Pushup strength, technique? ??
Patricia! Come to the women’s self defense class Tuesday 6:00 pm to 7:00 pm. I’ll show you how to move live, fighting people off of you!
Patricia - maybe the woman-on-top positions for sex are safer, not only in case of the man’s sudden death but in case of sudden death-like sleep!
I have to agree with Patricia about the dangers of men, of course. Males have proven to be much more dangerous than women to peaceful, sane coexistence on this planet. Men think women are dangerous because women on so many levels challenge men’s precious illusions of superiority and control. Such a complex subject - I’m sure it will continue to be debated forever! but wouldn’t it be better to be allies instead of enemies?
Anyway, I think it would be very cool to do a survival week. Lifting or dragging a companion (or child), climbing a tree, basic escape strategies, etc…. Maybe it’s out of the scope of crossfit, but we should all learn how to find water, make fire, build a survival shelter, and find food in case of true emergency or wilderness situation. These things also mean a lot of environmental awareness.
Gloria LOL… on top is definitely safer, but one must “not exclude” any positions :-)))
I agree with your statement on why men in general think women are dangerous. What i am more curious about is why Andres, a.k.a. Love Doctor, Dr. Dre, thinks they are..????
Survival is not out of the scope of crossfit, it IS crossfit - at least the physical parts. Have you ever watched Les Stroud “Survivor Man” not to be confused with the quack guy whose name i forget.. Les is the real deal. checkout his website: http://www.lesstroud.ca. He covers how to eat, make fires, shelters, avoid foot fungus, everything…
he’s got a great new book “Survive!” and lots of resources, not to mention his show, which he films entirely himself because he is actually “alone” surviving.
On second thought, Andres… be afraid, be very afraid. All around you are evil temptresses trying to lure you into the deep open waters of emotional confusion and loss of control to your sexual urges. If you give in, these dangerous sirens will pull you to the bottom of the sea, leading you to ruination, not to mention death and maybe even eternal torment! Even now we are subverting the patriarchy and taking over the world. Resistance is futile.
See, Andres! I told you they were out to get us!!
Patricia if an opponent or body is on top of you, you have to focus on the strongest part of your body (and one of my favorites!). You have to use your hips!
If you know what a glute-ham bridge ( http://digg.com/lbv.php?id=10984476&ord=1 ), you’ll want to thrust your hips up to create some space.
Pushing against them like a pushup or bench press may afford creating a small amount of space to move quickly out of but realistically let’s say said male is 200 pounds. That is one helluva bench press for a gal if she is 100-150 pounds.
What you’ll want to do is glute ham bridge and twist to the side cork-screwing one hip under the other. Nick can show you this as a basic escape.
~Gloria - I need directions and information on such temptresses. Do I have to hunt for them or put myself out there as bait or do they have meeting places…like CrossFitMarin?(and what days and times?)
Thanks Blair! Yes i know that move from Yoga “the bridge” ..never thought of that!! duh…definitely will try it… I’m 115 and was under dead body weight of 165lbs…
And thanks Nick!
Patricia: Were you watching a Seinfeld rerun? There’s an episode where Kramer falls asleep on top of a girl as he’s getting ready to take care of business. Ignore all these people asking you to bridge your hips and create space, etc. They have clearly not seen this episode.
It turns out that what you want to do in this situation is reach for a nearby phone, call your mob buddies, and have them bag up the offending male so that he may be dumped in a nearby convenient river. Problem solved, even if you’re with a giant of a man!
To note of what sort of poundage you can do with hip thrusts:
“Yes, the hip thrust is perfectly safe. In the past three years, I’ve had around ten male clients regularly hip thrust over 365 pounds for ten reps and around ten female clients hip thrust 135 pounds for ten reps. I’ve been hip thrusting 405 to 455 pounds for two year now, and my back has never felt healthier. ”
from http://www.tmuscle.com/free_online_article/sports_body_training_performance/dispelling_the_glute_myth
T-nation’s article tend not to be work/family safe and oriented to the guys with pictures of scantily clad women and locker room jibe.
Matt - LOL. it was not Seinfeld..sorry.. it was some depressing dark movie… hence i forgot it except for that scene..
Blair - thanks again, that’s an interesting site!
T-nation can be an interesting, a bit over the top in the articles and some feel they are supplement pushers.
However, they do have a lot of information in some articles besides some big names like Dave Tate, Charles Poliquin, Dan John, etc.
Their forum is a nightmare but I’m just not into bodybuilding or young guys interested in that world. I don’t care much for their articles focused on bodybuilding and hypertrophy but the ones regarding science, lifting, and athletes are worthawhile.
Besides, I need a laugh sometimes from the articles.
My main criterion for being strong and fit is, “Can I get myself and my children out of the path of danger if help is not available?”
I was very struck by a picture from Hurricane Katrina (cover of Time, maybe?) showing a young woman carrying an infant and a toddler through waist-deep water. Yeah, I want to make sure I can do that. For about 5 hours. Plus throw them up onto a roof or into a helicopter if necessary. If running from lions, I need to toss the boys over my shoulders and outrun at least one other person. I need to be able to catch them if Dean throws them out the window to me. (Thanks, medicine ball workout!)
I’m being a little silly about it here, but this absolutely my goal! Thanks, CrossFit Marin!
Emily, it’s nice to see some people have that attitude.
I tried using that logic on a lady I used to work with once, and she gave me a line about not needing to get strong because, if her children were ever in danger, she would be able to do whatever she needed to with the help of an “adrenaline rush.”
Sad, really.
I’d like to have strength as a first defense… the adrenaline is so I have something left to high-five the rescue team.
Ha ha! That’s great! I’m using that line, next chance I get!
Stronger people are harder to kill and generally more useful.
~Rip.